Girls and Sports

It's fall which means there's a whole slew of things going on in the sports world. The kickoff to the NBA season was last night and this week has been dubbed "premiere week". The World Series begins tonight which marks the beginning of the end of this year's baseball season. We're more than halfway through the college football season and the NFL is out in full-force. Soon enough we'll have college basketball also. This seems like an appropriate time to discuss girls and sports.

Do I think girls should play sports? Of course. Should they play the same sports as guys? For the most part, yes. Should they be playing football in their underwear? Probably not. Should they be playing softball in the Olympics? Yes. Should women/girls sporting events be on TV? Probably because it's only fair but I'm not going to watch them. Yes, I could continue and go into a nice long rant about girls playing sports but that's not nearly as exciting as girls watching sports.

My sisters, as much as I love them, are a perfect example of who I don't want to be near when a game is being played although they aren't as bad as other girls I've run into. Here's a run-down of girls and sports:

• Manly Girl - This girl is absolutely one of the guys. She probably plays at least 1 contact sport. The amount of sports knowledge she has is greater than most of the guys in the room and it's scary. She doesn't ask questions about the game and if you do, she probably won't answer them. She loves football and hates the new rule about suspensions for hard hits. She may or may not be a he.
• Sporty Girl - This girl definitely knows what's going on. She can talk a good game but isn't necessarily smarter than the guys. She'll dress for the occasion and if you're at a local bar watching a game she won't show up in heels. She may ask a question here or there and will probably be willing to help others who have questions. Some may be intimidated by her.
  
• Average Girl - She knows enough to get by. She pays attention, cheers for the correct team, and has a good time. She doesn't know all of the rules of the game and may ask a few questions but probably won't be obnoxious about it. When filling out her March Madness bracket she might choose based on team names and colors but at least she's trying.
• Girlie Girl -  This girl knows enough to know that guys like sports, so if watching/attending the game means she gets to hang out with the guys, she's in. She'll know what sport she's watching but she won't really know what's going on and she won't care. She uses sporting events as social events and uses her time to text and chat with her friends. She'll cheer...but only because everyone else is.
  
• Barbie Girl - She has no clue. She doesn't want to have a clue. She certainly doesn't want to mess up her new shoes and she doesn't really want you getting excited about what's going on because you may spill a beer in her fancy purse. She doesn't want to go to or watch the game and she can't figure out why you would want to either. She won't have a good time.

Ring any bells? If you're a Girlie Girl or a Barbie Girl, please consider either staying home or staying quiet because you're annoying everyone else. It's not that you don't serve a purpose in society, it's that you don't serve a purpose in the sports world. If you care, join in on the fun. If not, disappear.

P.S. If I offended you, I probably won't apologize because it probably needed to be said and you probably needed to hear it... :)

What the Shore Means to Me...

I remember the first time I saw the Shore. Sitting in my condo, flipping through the channels one fateful evening. Stopping on MTV to see my fellow tanned Italians guidos. Little did I know then, what all that the Shore would do for me.

Ever been in an elevator with an executive and can't find anything to talk about? Break the silence with a little GTL talk! Ever wanted to make the mundane task of getting dressed fun? Start screaming "It's T-shirrrtttt time!" Ever failed a test or blown a presentation at work and feeling stupid? Just watch the Jersey Shore! It's a cure all!

So what all has the Jersey Shore done for me? Let me count the ways:

- Helped improve my look. As The Situation says, "If you don't go to the gym, you don't look good. If you don't tan, you're pale. If you don't do laundry, you got no clothes."
- Taught me war tactics. How to handle grenades and decipher landmines.
- Improved my vocabulary. GTL, DTF, GFN, MVP.
- Showed me what NOT to do in a relationship. See Sammi and Ronnie.
- How to dance. FIST PUMP!
- How to be efficient at work. The Boardwalk T-shirt Shop. The Gelatto Shop.
- To take a breather when eating. Vinny's mom proved you can eat more if you just take a break between courses. Although, let's not pull a Ron.
- That you can drink all day, everyday. And be ok. That's all.


Here's to you Jersey Shore on your Season 2 Finale tonight! I'll drink a cup of Ron Juice for you!

House Hunting = Little House of Horrors

Oh. My. God. We're house hunting. We tried to give it a go on our own and realized we work best under pressure and because we're not under pressure to buy a house, we're not really giving it our all so we enlisted the help of a realtor who also happens to be dad's second cousin. I'm pretty sure I've viewed every available house in the area online and what I haven't found, she's doing a great job of digging up.

Here's the problem. I have one thought that rolls through my mind every time I click through the pictures of another house, "Oh. My. God. What were these people thinking?!" What were they thinking when they chose those decorations? What were they thinking when they took those pictures. I've carried over my dating-website philosophy to house-hunting: you're only going to post the best pictures you have to paint yourself (or your house) in a positive light so what you see in the picture, is the best it'll ever be.

Here's what I've come across:

• Wood paneled walls...sometime in the last 30 years it didn't occur to you that wood paneled walls are not ok?
• A cornucopia of flooring options...different carpet, different tile, wood, a little of this and a little of that all in the same lovely house
• A neon green pool...really? you didn't think to maybe dump a little algaecide or chlorine into the pool before you took the picture? 
• Odd paint jobs...yes, I know paint is the easiest thing to fix, that's not the point, the point is, why do people do the things they do? One house blinded me with the pictures as the rooms changed from neon yellow to bright red to sea-foam-green and a mural of a tree from an illustrated children's book on the wall behind the TV
• Clutter...doesn't anyone watch the 200 TV's they have scattered around the house? turn on HGTV and pick up a few tips. I don't need to see your sprawling basket collection. I don't care to see your tchotchke's scattered about. Box it all up and get rid of it, better yet, throw it all away! It's crap!
• Matchy-Matchy...it's probably unnecessary to use your leftover kitchen floor tiles for a counter-top. Parquet floors aren't my favorite but using 2-tones of parquet flooring to create a design is going too far. Aqua blue kitchen cabinets with a perfectly matching aqua wall oven can't possibly be safe because you know that oven was once used by the Alice and the Brady Bunch.
• Floral patterns...whether it's wallpaper or furniture or accent pieces, it's time for those to go bye bye

Of course we're rational enough to not of these really effect our final decision on a house but they really force me to question the sanity of a lot of people...

Dreams weaver...

Do you wake up every morning feeling like P Diddy? Are you one of those people that wakes up every day and remembers their dreams from the night before? If you answered yes to both these questions then you and I are very similar. I've always wondered what my dreams mean. I'll fill you in on the last couple of nights:

Monday night/Tuesday morning-
I was spending the night at a neighbors house, and they had a pet tiger. They made me sleep on the floor of the first floor of their house, which is also the floor that the tiger slept on. They told me that if the tiger came to bother me that I needed to be very stern and tell him to go back to bed. Of course, the tiger came over in the middle of the night, and I didn't want to yell because everyone was sleeping. Instead I had scratches all over my back from the tiger. The next morning the people were very upset with their tiger and they punished him.

The next thing I knew, I was in my car with Ashley and we were in a trailer park out in the woods. All the people from the park came out of their homes and they were attacking us!

Then I woke up.

Tuesday night/Wednesday Morning-
We were at home (Ashley Kady and Gianna). No one else. All the sudden these two men show up, one was a felon and the other was his attorney. We did multiple things to the felon, including injecting him with poison, hitting him over the head with shovels and stabbing him numerous times and he got back up every time. He was trying to break into the house.

Finally we were informed that he did all this for the trial he was on, kind of like Joaquin Phoenix, and there was no way we could kill him.

Then I woke up.

What exactly do these dreams mean? I guess I will never know!!!

Gotta run, cabs are here!
Kady

Fruit Fly Frenzy

I hate bugs...so moving to the South may have not been my best idea ever. The random dead roaches (and the occasional living roach) have me on edge a lot of the time. The good news about these fast, disgusting little creatures is that they hate the light. I, on the other hand, hate the dark so we rarely run into each other.

For a while we had an ant problem where the ants came marching 1 by 1 hoorah, hoorah! After days of drowning hundreds of visitors in windex (ala my days at IU and My Big Fat Greek Wedding) and spackling and caulking all holes/cracks and putting a death trap in the one gap we couldn't fill, the ants surrendered.

Enter fruit fly - Public enemy #1. From my days back in college, experimenting in a dreadful biology lab, I learned two things. First, I learned which tanning lotion provides the best tan. Second, fruit flies multiply quickly. When I moved to Florida there was a massive fruit fly problem hidden in one of the cabinets. What I can only assume to be an onion we left in the cupboard and biology + chemistry + zoology quickly created a disaster. We handled that situation and after a few days we were fruit fly-free.

I'm now left with just the occasional pesky fruit fly which seems pretty normal except these fruit flies are out for blood. The problem arises when 1 fruit fly, with nothing to snack on, turns into a nasty, hungry fruit fly. This 1 lovely fruit fly enjoys dive bombing my face, sitting on my breakfast and circling my food when I'm in the kitchen. Here I sit, minding my own business, trying to accomplish things today, and this fruit fly keeps appearing in front of the computer screen. What he doesn't know is that I'll cut a bitch. Watch out fly guy, this isn't over. I'm onto you!

Jackass 3D = 3 times the bad!

This past weekend the boyfriend (let's call him KT$ - because he's a baller) "treated" me to a night on the town. Dinner and movie. How sweet!

After filling up on margs (yes, tequila!) and queso (I managed to not get any in my hair...for a first), KT$ insisted that we needed to go see a movie. He coerced me to go with promises of anything I wanted from the concession stand! As you can imagine, I was delighted with thoughts of butter-soaked popcorn, Sour Patch Kids (only the red ones), and freezoni (Diet) Coke!

This was turning out to be quite the romantic night for me and my favorite foods...oh, and KT$, too ;)

OR so I thought! This fabulous evening suddenly became intertwined with the worst 90 minutes of my early-20s life! (I refuse to believe 24 is mid-20s.)

JACKASS 3D is NOT A MOVIE! Listen to me people! It's a bunch of 5 minute shorts with ugly, hyena laughing guys playing stupid tricks on each other meshed together into a 90 minute homage to idiocy. Ranging from wheelbarrowing down a water slide (pretty sure I did that in first grade, big whoop!) to falling into a pit of snakes (Indiana Jones did it better!), their "stunts" just weren't that funny.

To make it worse, it was in 3D! So the too-tight-for-my-big-head 3D glasses started giving me a headache, I couldn't take them off. You know what's worse than watching a bad movie in 3D? Watching a bad movie in 3D, without 3D glasses- blur centch!

And you wouldn't believe my dismay, when I woke up late Sunday morning to hear the news......

JACKASS 3D is the #1 MOVE IN AMERICA!

REALLY PEOPLE! Who would spend money watching this piece of junk? Even though KT$ footed the bill, I felt guilty we contributed to the $50 million it made! I feel embarrassed about it...must be like what people that voted for Obama feel. Well maybe not THAT bad, because, well, that is REAL BAD!

Moral of the story....Jackass 3D = 3 times the bad!

Ciao yall!

Kristin

Dinner & A Movie

We went to our favorite Arabic restaurant on Friday night to celebrate the end of the week. The atmosphere was great, the music was killer, and our waiter was.....Javier. Really? Javier? I don't have a problem with Javier being a waiter, I have a problem with Javier being a waiter at a Lebanese restaurant where 95% of the employees are obviously Arabs and 75% of the patrons are also Arabs. Javier also insisted on calling Mike "man" as in "need another drink, man?" The highlight of the night was the belly dancer who danced in Mike's ear with her little finger bells. In case anyone is interested, she teaches belly dancing on Saturday's and she "doesn't discriminate so guys are welcome as long as they aren't going to be pervs."

We went out again Saturday night. We were greeted by a friendly bartender who had plenty to say. Including wondering why the guy at the other end of the bar with the heavy southern accent was getting so riled up about "just a baseball game". Once we stepped outside for a nice relaxing dinner, we caught wind of a conversation at another table. A lovely woman who looked a little too much like Kathy Griffin was screaming at her husband. "You said 'stupid dog and stupid kids'?! Oh shit!" and then decided to continue chewing him out about this and other things for the next hour+, only stopping for air when the waiter stopped by. Mike said if they weren't married, he would have waited for Kathy to go to the bathroom and he would have screamed at the guy to run while he still can! Where are people's manners? How is it an enjoyable dinner when you yell at someone the entire time? I'm pretty sure that guy works 20 hours a day to avoid being home with Kathy. I know I would.


We also saw Wall Street 2 and we really enjoyed all of the cameo's from all of the players from the original movie. Well done.

Cast Member Bio: KRISTIN

You think you know, but you have no idea, this is the Real World, Atlanta.

If you know Kristin, then you know that any time with Kristin is a good time! Spend 5 minutes with her and you will know the following..

Kristin is a lover of:
Anything Georgia Tech
The Backstreet Boys
Her family
Italian food
Harrison Ford
Shia Labeouf
Celebrity Gossip
Diet Coke and Rum
Oh and Kenneth!

Kristin is not your average girl next door, she's full of life, laughter and her mothers cooking. Don't get me wrong though, she loves to hit the gym when she's not busy saving the world! Kristin is also one of the biggest hypochondriacs that I've ever seen, so don't ask about a random freckle or she will run to the ER.

If Kristin walked into a room, her theme song would be "UPTONS UPTONS, JUST WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR!"

Kristin is a great catch, but she is NOT single, maybe ready to mingle, but probably not accepting applications!

Love to ya brotha,

Kady

Cast Member Bio: Meet the A in KAK!

I have the great pleasure of introducing all you people (all zero of you) to Ashley Elizabeth Abdelnour - aka ASH $CASH$ (her self-proclaimed alter ego). Ashley was born, had a childhood, grew up, you get the drift. But it's the story along the way that makes Ashley, the owner of the world's ugliest dog, who she is. I had the pleasure of knowing Ashley in high school where she was very popular and had a MASSive amount of friends including one "Charlie Blue Eyes" and Jason Barker (rawr!).

After too many rides in Ms. Shorty's convertible, Ash headed up north to her "Sports Mecca." Her favorites include: IU, Notre Dame, Michigan, MSU, Detroit Tigers, Boston Celtics. How can someone have so many favorites, you ask? She has a rolodex of "favorites" so that she can always say "her" team won.

There are a few factors that separate Ash out from the KAK:
1) She's old (er than KK).
2) She's engaged to a VP (let's call him Cayman - because he owns one).
3) She's a health nut (expect to see many blogs on grilled chicken and grapes).
4) She's wise beyond her years (gives the tough advice).
5) She lives on the beach (she'll be tan year round).

From Ash you'll find sarcasm at its finest, matter of fact philosophy with love behind it, and wedding blog posts because after marrying Cayman she'll finally have fulfilled her dream of becoming ASH $CASH$!

Ciao all!

Kristin

PS - She is a hater of all things Twilight, yet her dog is named BELLE (Bella) - expect hypocrisy!

Cast Member Bio: The DL on KD

When you look at Kady, the first thing you notice is her hair: she’s our token ginger and my younger sister. Does that say enough or should I keep going?

When she is not fulfilling her role as house-manager, KD tends to be very cultured. The first and only books she has ever cracked opened were Harry Potter followed by Twilight. She’s not necessarily a sports fan but is excellent at pretending to know and care what is going on. If I had to guess her favorite teams I’d say “the home team or whoever is winning”. To stay up-to-date on current events, she tunes into her Facebook newsfeed or watches reality TV. She can not survive without her phone and is anxiously awaiting the day when Verizon has iPhones.

Over the years we’ve found ourselves in a fair amount of sticky situations including, but not limited to, shattering the glass table on the patio while our parents weren’t home, dropping a large, heavy Christmas tree box on our heads, and getting socks stuck on the chandelier.

She has kind eyes but maintains a good mix of subtle hilarity, honesty, and sarcasm. Expect Kady to help you better understand the meaning of life, her latest antics as house-manager, or perhaps her thoughts on the latest movies and hot tracks!

Chat at ya soon,
Ash

P.S. She’s a great catch AND single & ready to mingle! Now accepting applications…

Welcome!

Well, we've decided to give blogging a try. What do we expect from this? Not a whole lot more than a few entertaining blog postings. What will come of this? Probably nothing but you never know...Zuck did get his start blogging! What will we write about? Anything and everything we can think of...it could get scary! We will try not to but if we offend you in any way, well, there's a decent chance you deserved it :)

Please stay tuned for cast bios!!

**No animals were harmed in the making of this blog...

ENJOY!!

PS. Can we meet with the Winklevi twins?? ;)